Freqently Asked Questions

General FAQ

Public Events: We host sexy-themed events that are open to the public. Sex is not allowed at these events although they may allow some play and are often sexy-themed. Read the rules for each event you plan on attending.

Private Play Parties: Members and their trusted guests are welcomed at events where sex is allowed and encouraged. Members and their guests are vetted, creating a safer space for people to explore and play.

Educational Workshops: We believe that education should be available to everyone, therefore, we welcome members and non-members at all of our classes, workshops, and discussions. All events, whether public or private, are open to people 21 years of age and older. For legal reasons we are not able to welcome anyone under the age of 21.

The crowd often varies depending on the type of event. While ages vary, many of our guests are in their late 20's and 30's and make efforts to look their best when attending an event. As an inclusive sex-positive community we never discriminate based on age, body type, gender or gender expression, sexual preference, race, physical ability, or relationship structure. We do not separate ticketing by gender or relationship status. We find that gender ratios at private events are almost always balanced.

Our membership system is based on referrals so we can grow our community while everyone remains accountable.

1. Fill out the online membership form and include a reference of a current member. Take care to represent yourself enthusiastically and authentically in your application. It matters. .

References ensure that everyone is accountable, so you will be asked to provide a reference. This reference should be a member of the Hacienda Community. It's best to reach out to your contact before applying and checking in with them to make sure they are happy to vouch for you.

If you don't know anyone in the community, you can also apply with a friend or partner. To do this each of you needs to fill out a separate application and list each other as your reference. You should both apply on the same day.

You will also be asked to upload a photo of yourself. This is so we can verify your identity and know you are the same person who applied when you come to our events. It's highly encouraged to include a social media account. Rest assured, we always keep your personal information private.

2. Hacienda will contact your reference for confirmation that they know, trust, and vouch for you, that you will read, understand, and follow Hacienda's rules and consent policies, and that you will bring something positive to the community.

3. Once approved for membership, you will receive an email prompting you to set up your account and create a password within our system. This is required as you'll need to log in to purchase tickets to members only events.

You'll be prompted to pay for membership when you buy an event ticket. Membership costs $40 for 3 months (if we're just feeling each other out) or $120 for the whole year (if you know what you like!). Once you are a member you can invite trusted guests using the invite feature. Membership dues are non-refundable. Membership status, regardless of payment, is at our discretion and may be revoked at any time.

4. Your email address will be added to our weekly newsletter. Email is the best and least restrictive form of communication we have with you. To ensure our emails don't go to your spam inbox, whitelist us by hovering over our email address: '' in your email client, and clicking 'Add to contacts'.

Everyone is welcome at our public events and you may come alone, however, if you are coming to an event for the first time, we encourage you to attend with a friend.

Members are welcome to come solo to any of our private events unless the event specifically states otherwise.

If you are the guest of a member at a private event you need to arrive with that member.

Hacienda hosts many types of events but you can always count on our principles of consent, sex positivity to remain the same. The best way to get an idea of what a specific event will be like is to read the entire event description on the ticket page.

Our largest play parties are titled 'Hacienda Presents:'. At these events you can expect a big party with plenty of play. Multiple areas feature space for socializing, meeting new people, enjoying sexy playtime, and lounging inside or outside. No one is required or expected to play.

Some guests come dressed in costume according to the theme, and some just wear whatever makes them feel sexy. Everyone is expected to make an effort to dress either nicely or creatively. DJ's play music to get you in the mood and often we have performances or interactive games.

We ask you to bring your own drinks and we'll have mixers for you at our bar. Appetizers are available at the beginning of the evening and we feature a full meal around 2am so you can keep your energy up for more hours of fun. Once you've purchased a ticket to one of our private events it's important to read the entire email confirmation so you have all of the relevant information.

Communication is the most important thing to keep in mind. As long as you communicate your requests and boundaries you should feel free to be yourself. We work to create a space where guests are encouraged to explore their sexuality and self-expression, therefore we expect everyone to be kind and treat each other with respect.

You may be near people or things that don't turn you on but don't ever shame someone or be rude. Be aware of your alcohol consumption and make sure you remain in a position to give and get consent. If you have any questions at the event find someone wearing a Guardian armband and they can help you. Please also be sure to familiarize yourself with our Consent Policy

COVID-19 precautions are determined based on the type of event. We may ask for proof of vaccination and/or negative COVID tests. Please be sure to read the entire event description, which will include specifics.

Did you know you can LIVE at Hacienda? Hacienda cultivates intentional living spaces for sex positive people in Brooklyn, New York. All available bedrooms will be listed on the Properties Page.

Visit our booking site for more information or to make your reservation. Note that the entire house must be rented, we do not rent individual bedrooms. The price for a weekday night is anywhere from $600-$1,200 and the price for a weekend night ranges from $1,400-$1,900. The house can accommodate up to 16 guests and if needed there is an additional house next door that can accommodate up to 8 people.

Go ahead and talk about Hacienda, sex-positive culture, and sex parties—it's exciting stuff and it will help us grow this amazing community! Just make sure you don't share personal details about others without their consent.

If you're a member we welcome you to bring along your trusted friends to a public event (sexy-themed, no play) or a private event (with full play) depending on their level of comfort. If it's a play party guests of members will be expected to attend the orientation where they'll learn our rules and etiquette first hand. Members must come with any guests they've invited.

You can also encourage friends to sign up for our public newsletter, or to apply for membership and offer to be their reference.

We respect the privacy of our members and will never sell or distribute your name, contact info or other personal information to any other organization.

Membership is $40 every 3 months or $120 for a year and gives you access to our private events. The membership fee is separate from the cost of individual event tickets. Each event ticket is for ONE person (unless otherwise stated) and usually costs between $45-$85 for parties, less for workshops.

Visit our Membership page for full details on how to join.

Member FAQ

Once you fill out the application, you should receive an email within seven days if you are approved.

You need to be approved for membership and you need to have a user login for our portal. All of our events will be listed in our newsletters and on our website. When you click 'Buy Now' for a members only event, you will be asked to log in before you can purchase the tickets.

If you've been a member in the past and/ or you receive our members emails go to the login page on our website and click 'request username'. Then, enter the email you signed up for your membership with (It should be the same email address where you receive our newsletters). You will receive an email with instructions for setting up a password and logging in.

If you are newly applying for membership, your application approval email will include information on how to create a username and password. Your username will be your email address.

Yes you can. To invite guests: after purchasing your event ticket, go to your member portal by logging in on our website.

Go to the left hand menu and select 'My Invitations'. Find your event, select 'Invite a Guest' and enter the name and email of the non-member you would like to invite. They will receive an email which will allow them to purchase a ticket. You can repeat this process and invite as many guests as you want.

Hacienda members are accountable for their guests' behavior. Members and their guests must check in together at our events.

Yes. We need members to be accountable for their non-member guests. All people who purchase tickets together must arrive at Hacienda together, including if they need to attend the orientation.

All party guests must purchase their own ticket. You will purchase a ticket for yourself first, then use the instructions under the question 'Can I invite non members to join me at a private event?' to invite your guests when you know who they will be.

If you can no longer attend an event, email with your request no later than the specified time listed in the ticket confirmation email. We will grant you an account credit in your member portal which can be applied to the purchase of a future ticket or member dues. Membership dues provide access to the events and are never refundable.

Go to your member portal and select 'Change Password' from the side bar menu.

When you purchase a ticket, you will receive an email confirmation. Bring that ticket on your phone or printed out. It will include a QR code. If you invited a non-member guest, you must arrive with them. Please be sure to check the COVID-19 policy for each event, you may be required to show proof of vaccination for entry.

If you invited a non-member guest, you must arrive with them.

Memberships are non-refundable and they are not recurring. If you don't want to pay for membership again, you can just choose to let your membership lapse when it expires.